Married to an Idea
Entertaining the concept that the idea “chooses you”. Like a match made in heaven, like when you meet someone and it just works. There is a journey to be had and lessons to be learned, a relationship to share with creativity.
I have recently been reading a book called “Big Magic” by Elizabeth Gilbert.
I love when I read a book at the right moment in my life — when I am in thirst for that information to be expressed and when I read it I can feel the shift of perception happening. Like getting a massage on those knots you have been carrying around in your shoulders. All of those questions your mind has been ruminating on and “whoosh” — that was it! Pressure relieved.
I feel like this was one of those concepts for me. It may not have landed so profoundly a few months or years ago, but we were in the right place and the right time (you can’t plan these things).
I am the type of person who can easily commit in relationships. I naturally see beyond imperfections and am able to easily admire the best qualities in others. I do not run away at the first sign of trouble — in fact I love the challenge of working through it.
But when it comes to ideas/passions/hobbies… they often have a expiry date for how far I decide to take it with them. I never ghost them, but they are more like a good friend you just fall out of touch with and when you see them again, it is totally all good. Oh, and I can’t seem to choose just one of them.
For example, I have many loves. I am polyamarous when it comes to my creativity and interests. Many creative flows love to live through me. Singing, journaling, crochet, sewing, jewellery design, playing the piano, songwriting, dancing, creating movement routines, learning about psychology, mental health, nutrition, esoteric and spiritual practices such as the Tarot or Astrology. Yoga (I have my YTT certificate). I love learning about relationship dynamics, family dynamics, trauma and therapy. Self-care, hair and make-up. Photography. I love to draw and to write poetry. To be in nature. Dance parties. To nurture animals and plants. (Maybe I was a witch back in the day).
I love all of these things. I always thought that if I stuck with one of them long enough, they could go to another level. Inspire others, bring opportunities etc… I always wanted one of them to be “my thing” that I did day in and day out until it became my identity.
Perhaps one day I will. And in some ways, I already have. But maybe when I am ready — I can choose one like on the bachelor and we will become married. Maybe married and divorced and married again to a different one.
That’s why I believe it is important to do what brings you joy in these relationships with creative pursuits. Not to do it gain something from them. As I have learned from the book mentioned above, they are living entities. There is so much content out there on attracting the right romantic partner into your life. I think it is the same with these creative loves. You gotta be in the right place and the right time. You can’t control these things, but you can start by accepting your present moment and where you are at. Some of these creative relationships are born out of pain and tragedy. Some are born when you feel good. Just believe in yourself and put it out there that you are searching to connect with them and bring them to life.